Friday, December 9, 2011

The ripple effect

Every incident happen in life leaves its consequences/after effect.

A friend that passed away suddenly made me realize again how abrupt and unpredictable life can be.Rather than sulking and being unhappy most of the times,i should make myself happier,and enjoy life more.

When routine sets in,life will get numb.It's not all about work,but the small encounter during the process that need to be cherish.I need to make sure ,the negative enviroment im in,doesnt take away the passion i had.To give up a dream and try to live others,it's worse than suicide.

So the conclusion,i will still stand by my dream!

Monday, October 10, 2011

Question of the day

Consultant :What is the most common brain tumor in Adults?
HO (girl) :Metastasis,thyroid carcinoma,rectum...
Consultant :What else...
HO (girl) :Erm...
Consultant :What do you have that other people dont have?
HO (girl) :Testis!?

Thank you for making my day,LOL....

Thursday, September 29, 2011

End of september...

It's another month filled with different emotion/different encounter...My life has been far from simple/dull.Workings days for me it's never been always easy.But i think saying goodbye probably it's the hardest thing in life.Well ,life goes on for everyone...Live Life

Until we meet again -housemate/colleague/swimming kaki /my friend :)

Monday, August 15, 2011

THIEF!!!

Yes,it was a weird night.For no reason i had a can of nescafe,difficult to sleep....Finally slept at 1 am...Then...in the middle of the night woken up ,the window was opened,the shades was pulled to one side,and i could see a shadow standing near a window...

"HEY!!!!!!!!!!!!"i shouted,and he jumped down from the window side...

I couldnt slept well...This is the first time i felt so insecure in a house

Wished i had the stick or my squash racqet with me,then i can whack the brains out of the malicious thief!!!!

Saturday, August 13, 2011

D4,D5 Jaipur,D6,D7 Udaipur...

Jaipur was the next destination for our india trip.Skipped Pushkar as wanted to reserve more time for Shimla...however my india trip end prematurely because of food poisoining....probably my gut would become more resilient after this....

Jaipur offered a different kind of sites to see.The city palace,the pink city and monkey temple were the fews that left some memories...Stayed in Pearl Heritage ,which to me was the MUST STAY hotel .Moderate room rates but 5 stars facilities /hospitality/restaurants/service....I must say Jaipur is the city to have a ayurvedic oil massage(to my shocking horror-need to strip near naked with a skimpy semi translucent underwear).It was really awkward but the massage was really relaxing...The visit to Choki Dani for some indian cultural experince plus great dinner was really worth the money...I even let a palm reader intrepreted my palm lines...here how it goes:

Me :HI,you speak english?
Palmist :Come,sit down(looking at my palm,not wasting anytime)
Palmist :Health got prob,long life,work in other country--good money good money
Me :Erm ok....
Palmist :Luck no prob,money no prob,hmm....angry nature ,angry nature...
Me :Wow,the angry nature kinda true
Palmist :Spend money a lot,strict person....once married 3 children...
Me :(now where did he get that???)
It only takes 5 minutes for him to read a person life...haha....

Udaipur is my favourite city of all.Peaceful,serene,soothing scenaries,lots of small shops to see/choose from...This is a city where arguebly is the most romantic city in India.I must admit it is kinda true.I had wonderful dinners with my travelling mates and met a spain couple who we encountered back in Delhi.Sadly this was the place where my food poisoining started...I cut short my trip and came back to west malaysia earlier....

I think this was the most challenging trip i ever been through ...with the upset stomach,extreme tempeture,tourist vultures, and vastly different culture/people...Never the less im just grateful to have experince such a trip with wonderful travelling mates...Being in India does changed my perspective on life...

Monday, August 1, 2011

Day 3 Agra

We left Delhi to Agra via train.The sights in Delhi were thought provoking...

The statement that India is a land of extremes is not over exaggerated.The poor comunity are really hardcore poor,sleeping on the streets with no proper shelter,kids malnourished with bronze coloured hair,scrawny bodies,begging on the streets...While some lived in luxurious home,kids pampered with all sorts of nice clothing/snacks...India's caste system practiced since their olden age left its impact even until modern days.Those poor will remain poor,and rich comunity will continue to prosper..

Im glad to leave Delhi,coming to Agra let me breath fresher air.Sadly visiting Agra i saw there a few instances why India gave tourists really bad experinces.We bought tickets for Taj Mahal near Eastern Gate,which needed 15 minutes of walking.There we noted a foreign Indian with his family being conned by other people into buying fake tickets(brown coloured) and was denied entrance to Taj Mahal.He complaint to the ticket officers but nothing much they could do.Both parties were annoyed with each other and in the end he need to buy the tickets(red coloured) again.His statement ring in my head for a very long time:"This is how india make more money,im so proud to be an Indian !"

I anticipated Taj Mahal even more after seeing other people ordeal/difficulty into witnessing one of the wonders of the world.We were lucky that we didnt fall into the hands of cunning tourist vulture,or the visit to Taj Mahal would be soured.From what i wanted to say,Taj Mahal Lived up to its beauty.The meer sight of the palace takes my breath away.I loved how the building radiate a pure glow of white,it felt so pure and majestic.The sun was ruthless again,even in the middle of the heat we had photo frenzy....The interior part of the palace was cooler in contrast to the outside,most probably it was built with marble stone,while the tombs sent out eerie kind of sadness...

Visit to Fathepur Sikhri was tainted by the dishonesty of our taxi driver.He asked for toll money though we thought it was included in the fee and we noted that he spoke something to the toll boy and he slipped back some money back concealed underneath a white paper.He tried to introduce us to guide but we were wise to refuse.The monument wasnt as amazing but still i can imagined its glory during the past.

Next Agra Fort was also an enjoyable place to visit as we were able to view Taj Mahal as how Emperor Shah Jahan did when he was imprisoned here.Loved the architecture but felt that some area lacked of safety precaution facilities .A child wander too close to the edge and luckily the parents manage to stop him in time.

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

Day 1 and 2 India - New Delhi

Yes,HOLIDAY!After long stretch of every other day oncalls finally im off to India for my long awaited end of housemanship trip...I should say that i am not well read on what im going to get myself into but my traveling mates had done enough research..


We reached New Delhi on 24/7/2011 and checked in Delhi Bed and breakfast.I was astounded on the detailed personal touch on every corner of the homestay.The room was very comfortable with well equit facilities such as TV,AC,Heater....etc...We only visited dreamland on the first night

We began our first day with a sumptuos breakfast prepared by homestay and went to the railway station to book train ticket for the rest of the journey.The owner gave us really good advice on what to do and to be careful of.It is true,the second we head our way to the ticket office located on 1st floor of the station,some chatty local indian came and tried to divert us to another place.A good advice for whoever wanted to buy train tickets,head straight towards the platform and there is stairs on right side,just go up and you will see the sign .There were people who were cheated into buying overprice tour-package.So,do not believe anyone who try to tell you anything when you try to buy train ticket from the official counter.


The first destination was Red Fort(Lal Qila).It was once a residence for Mughal Emperor Shah Jahan.The fort was built with red stone,under the hot scroching heat,the buildings looked magificient.We travel by taxi though there are places to reach etiher by foot or tricycle.After the red fort we headed for lunch which somehow we were diverted into another restaurant,overprice and food is just mediocre,so lesson to learn,if you wana go sumwhere specific,do not listen to driver:"closed...not open now......i have a better place..."it is just their scam to get comission when they brought new customers to the shop.

Jama Masjid was another disapointment.I got so irritated with the attitude of the people there....I told them im not using the camera in my pocket,but he insist to charge me for the camera,plus he tried and pulled out my camera from my jeans,really felt like punching the guy in the face.In response i just waited outside.

Next was the Humayun's Tomb,At least the lanscape of this monument was a scene to behold.Lot of locals visiting this landmark,and eagles/crows flying leisurely over the top of the tomb.

Day2 india ended with nice dinner from Saravanan's restaurant,We ordered Thali,mysore park,different kinds of roti and local drinks.it did provide some consolation after few unhappy experince during the day.


Thursday, July 21, 2011

A new chapter

Been working as a neurosurgical medical officer for the past 1 month.Adjustment disorder is surely a problem.As i mentioned,the choice was not mine.I once thought i would be able to cut/repair on human body.But many experinces had thought me well that particular field is not my way of life in the future.

I know i need stability,i need time for things i feel important,and most importantly not being call in the middle of the night for some kind of emergency operation.The prolonged standing,the bloody gloves,working closely with anaesthesis,cold OT hall....OMG

But being in this department gave me a chance to see things existed underneath.How true , that people can appear kind but underneath lies a snake waiting to spit it's venom.People can make you believe,give you a thousand reason for you to make a decision,but what you didnt see it is also for their own benefit.

The longer in medical field,the lesser friend you would retain.Somehow perception on the ones you know will just change.Friends can become enemies ,in just matter of "cases".People tend to think for themselves 1st sometimes,rather than for the patient.

Endless learning,and i think i just started...

Wednesday, June 15, 2011

It's all about unhappiness



No matter how hard i tried,things doesnt go as planned..

When i try to accept a decision,a decision to give and take,but i was compromised instead..

What am i doing here?When initially i thought i have found the way,i got lost even deeper

I cant even imagine where will i be sometimes...

Other people can have their choices,why was i sacrificed? for the sake of the system that filled with flaws and personal agenda?

Is it worth it???


Some part of life,it's just like walking along the beach,leaving footsteps behind,after a few seconds,they are washed away by the wave,as if you were never here before...

Sunday, June 5, 2011

Series of unfortunate events..

Im currently at one of the lowest state of my life...

Didnt make it through the exam,which i tried to prepare for the past 4 months...

Family members one by one got sick...(but recovering)

Unfinished issues with my sisters family,which really starts to get on my nerves...

Life may not go as planned,im trying my best to put a brave face on all of these and move on.It does hurt and felt defeated sometimes, when those you expect support seems to care less.

It doesnt really matter

Wipe away everything and life goes on...:)

Friday, June 3, 2011

Not a good news..

Today was the verdict,and unfortunately i dont have good news to share...Might as well try again next time...sigh....It's fake to say im not sad...but it's already done,might as well looked forward and go on,must pick up myself and try again...

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Pray...

It was the day today,i had post exam headache...sigh....Had a taste of a private college facilities,it was not bad though...

A lot of people sent me their wishes,and i hope i dont let them down,crossing my fingers and praying hard now until the day result is ready.....

Sunday, May 1, 2011

Simple pleasures

Simple pleasures :

Reading a book,alone, with a cold drink

Listening to music while facebooking

Driving ,no traffic jam

Bright sunny day,cloudy sky(even though sweaty)

Playing PS2

Swimming in the big pool,forgetting all the troubles on my mind

Shopping for books

Watching a nice movie in cinema(when plenty of seats are empty)

Spending time with friends

Talking over the phone,just to say :"how are you doing"

Lying in the bed,for that extra 5 minutes(usually becoming half an hour)

Unexpected/expected SMSs...

You do feel better,when you think of what you got,instead of dwelling on what you had not gain...

Saturday, April 30, 2011

Letting go...

Life has many choices,when one door closes,another door may opened up...There are decisions to be made,and it is not about choosing the right one,it is about choosing what is best for everybody...Some say choices are made for you,when you live in a country like Malaysia....But people do beg to differ,if you do not give me options,i will give myself options....

Tuesday, April 19, 2011

My Brain and spongiform encephalopathies

It's becoming this sad state.When i wanted it to have more sulci and gyri,now it's atrophy with holes on it...I do felt old certain time but i felt my brain is deteorating even more...Einstein can you passed your wisdom to me in this trying times....

Counting days to May 10...before the ARMAGEDDON...

Something related but not directly.Had to cancel my Taiwan trip because of the exam,and yesterday i dreamt about travelling in Taiwan...sigh....Sacrifices....I want my holiday...................real bad...........

Thursday, April 14, 2011

UN-happiness

Un-happy things has been going on in my sister's life,all those drama,really hated it...He is just like a chronic disease ,now causing all the ruckus again with all the money lenders...What worries me the most is their safety...sigh...times like this i wished i can do something but i am not capable ...

The world and people are fallen ill,and it is getting worse,when will all these sickness stop???maybe one day the greatest invention that really deserve a nobel price is a drug which counter the addiction to gambling...Then probably the world would be a better place

Saturday, April 9, 2011

Source Code

Love can exist even beyond time and space....A nice one indeed!

Tuesday, April 5, 2011

The reason why to love Sabah Part 2

It's been awhile since i put photos ...just some i took out of randomness/trips.1st one it's one of the view in Laban Rata,halfway to Mount Kinabalu
Witnessing sunrise on the top of Mount Kinabalu,experince of a lifetime.
View outiside our hostel in Laban Rata,Mount Kinabalu
A Kingfisher,caught on camera while it was sleeping on a branch...Medical camp in Sukau,Sandakan
Last year's Long Zou competition at Likas Beach


Sunset views in Kg Klokol...

The world just need a little of our time and attention,to discover what is around us...

Why not enjoy the journey,instead of missing every single chance by rushing away....


Saturday, April 2, 2011

Saturday afternoon...

I know i should be studying,just that right now i do not have the mood.Surgical posting is the last posting.With the exam on the mind im really not enjoying it... Sometimes this sense of escapism sets it,and i just felt like walking away... I am often thinking,is there another path for me? Sigh...hot ,boring saturday afternoon...

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Denial..

As time goes by,this word gets more and more relevant..

Exam date is near,but im still procastinating,it's denial...

Getting breathless after a few flights of stairs,consoling myself will get some more exercise,just that no time now...(denial again)

"i thought i knew the pathophysiology...maybe i just blank out..."(denial of ignorence)

Somebody came up and say:"hey i know about........." Me with a monotonous tone:"Is it?i know nothing about it. Hey i got stomachache,chat next time."(denial smack right on your face)

Maybe i should just wake myself up and stop dreaming,it is time to live the moment right now

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Change is near...


Change is always a part of life.It is the end of a posting and a starting for the last one.In no time soon i would be somewhere other than here...

When you are comfortable with something,you will always become complacent,afraid of what new changes may bring...Now this is the second phase of change ,so much of uncertainty...especially location of district that will be posted to...

Another thing on my mind would be the working colleagues ...working team is always very important.Let's hope that the future ones are as excellent as d ones i worked with...

With change a person can learn about himself better,no matter what may come...I like changes but at the same time dread its uncertainty...There is not always a rainbow after a rain you know...haha...Just hoping for the best to come!

Sunday, January 16, 2011

A letter to my patients

Dear patients,

I know there's a small lump on your face,but that doesnt mean you cant work and need a MC.

I know it is very painful,please let me prepare the medication 1st.

I know you waited a long time,that doesnt give you the right to cut queue(esp when the patient before you are elderly)

I know your relative is sick,that doesnt mean you can scold our staff without any good reasons.

I know it is a very very tempting "sup tulang",please remember you have gouty arthritis.

I know you want to have a friday night fever,but dont bikin panas by fighting with other friday feverish people.

I know it is nice to get high on booze,but please dont DRINK and DRIVE!

I know you are Datuk/Datin,please remember other people is also not feeling well.

I know it is a lot of medication,please remember to take them/refill PRN!!!

I know hospital is the last place you wana be in,but please do come before it really got worse...

I know i may sound rude and harsh,in the end im just a human,who may just care too much or just too tired at certain times.

I know life can be full of suprises,so stay healthy and safe so we can enjoy every moment of our life...

Yours sincerely,
A human who in dire need of a break

Tuesday, January 4, 2011

My 1st Saman(traffic offense)

Yup,and it was causing obstruction to the traffic....finding the traffic police station was also an adventure,nearly walked the whole Gaya street (it was actually located outside of it...zzz...)

Monday, January 3, 2011

Music

Another part of life that i enjoyed the most is listening to music,especially when the songs resounds with your mood or thoughts.

My daily routine,except from work(eat up a chunk of of time a day),would be travelling to work.Yes,Kota Kinabalu HAS TRAFFIC JAM.(It really irks me that some of my old school mates thought that Sabah is very "kampung".)During the entrapment,music is the greatest escape.

It's doesnt matter how bad my voice sounds,sometimes i will just have a nice sing along.(which might be visible through the windshield,who cares!).My recent favourite playlist would be songs from albums such as Train -Save Me San Francisco,Katy Perry -Teenage Dream....Daughtry is a all time favourite ,but linkin park was just a dissapointment...

My car secret compartment will soon burst out with all the CDs i bought...Im so glad that nowadays whenever i feel a bit impulsive,i can just buy the CDs...regardless the price...:)
Great music is worth the money!